When you fall.

It happened a few years back. But when she comes tonight, the ugly memory just keep on repeating,
makes me remember how she 'tortured' me before. I just dont know how to pretend, even though I really have to pretend. YEAH, THAT FAKE SMILE, SARAH. :'(



And I'm idiot who think it thousand times over and over again.

Like, this is my Mama :'(

Mama, this is all in my heart.

  :'( Sila LIKE! XD

It is inside out.

Im sorry that this post is going to be emotional again. But I just dont know how to overcome this sadness. *sigh*
Please slap hard on my face .


When a girl is silent, that's pretty dangerous. She's either overthinking, tired of waiting, about to blow, lonely, needs a hug, falling apart or crying inside. And most probably all of those above. :')

True., I just can't deny that the girl is probably me. T__T
And now, Im watching Glee. Just want you to know that I am still in the mood of holiday;  forgot to bring pens to class. *sigh*

There are too much sigh here and there. I just need to write for now, so that I can forget all things that happened. My friend had told me this ; don't cry because it happened, but smile because it happened. :)
So now, I am smiling. To remember all motivational words, there will be some happiness for me. Yes, but, I am not sure if that is to be considered as good or bad. What do you think, buddies?
What to do for now? Life is about a circle. Once you are sad, the happiness will chase after you later on. But, what you need to do is having faith in Him that life is fair, will curved you a smile. :)

P.s: I am not crying. Probably, I am sick of too much crap.

one great shot from Glee. yes, I am enjoying it. :)

 Good night. And good bye. :) Sila LIKE! XD

I'm fine.

two words: IM FINE.

Okay, enough for now. take care people. 

Sila LIKE! XD

. An old happy father :)

Seriously, this is serious that I miss him. Like a lot. Seriously. T__T
Please listen to this song on YouTube. I know we have heart :')
This is Lina's fault to make me listen to this song. ;p
And of course, I want you to listen to this song. Now! (see how desperate I am?) ;p
Now, there you go, Yeusuf Islam :)   (I love your Islam name though)   :)



Father
It's not time to make a change,
Just relax, take it easy.
You're still young, that's your fault,
There's so much you have to know.
Find a girl, settle down,
If you want you can marry.
Look at me, I am old, but I'm happy.

I was once like you are now, and I know that it's not easy,
To be calm when you've found something going on.
But take your time, think a lot,
Why, think of everything you've got.
For you will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not.

Son
How can I try to explain, when I do he turns away again.
It's always been the same, same old story.
From the moment I could talk I was ordered to listen.
Now there's a way and I know that I have to go away.
I know I have to go.

Father
It's not time to make a change,
Just sit down, take it slowly.
You're still young, that's your fault,
There's so much you have to go through.
Find a girl, settle down,
if you want you can marry.
Look at me, I am old, but I'm happy.
(Son-- Away Away Away, I know I have to
Make this decision alone - no)
Son
All the times that I cried, keeping all the things I knew inside,
It's hard, but it's harder to ignore it.
If they were right, I'd agree, but it's them They know not me.
Now there's a way and I know that I have to go away.
I know I have to go.
(Father-- Stay Stay Stay, Why must you go and
make this decision alone?)

forgive me, dad.

If you dont feel sad, you dont need to have heart :)
The son is leaving his father. :'(

Dad, forgive me with all my mistakes. I know this cruel daughter hurt u so much. but deeply in my heart, I do love you. Forgive me when  I was down. Forgive me when I did not reply your smile as the most precious gift, and please forgive me the time people turn you down because of me, because of your children. I am just worried if I might hurt you before Allah get you back. Dad, I'll always keep you in my prayer. Never ever lose you. I love you. xoxo

[homesickkk]   T___T

p.s: Thank you so much Yusuf Islam. I love your new name. I love how you are zero , now turn to hero. Thanks :)

an old father carrying a young son. :)

Sila LIKE! XD

enough.

enough is enough. 


Smile Sarah, smile :) Sila LIKE! XD

A sick heart is smiling. :')

Salam. Surely, today, the day was just fine. Me and my friends (most of them are my classmates). So, basically, i have no idea on how to make me more happy than just smiling and giggling all day long. But then , when it turned out to Maghrib, we can see how “what goes around comes around” is really happening to me. (i use present tense- with the current time). Well, my mood was ruined and i have no idea on how to make me smile. Yes, i can smile.(as you know that i can EASILY smiling to people, eh?) and yes, i can smile. But the heart is hurt. Right now. J have no idea. Maybe it’s because of how i’m so happy today. Usually, when you feel to much joy, yet it can turn out to be vice versa. Yet, im hoping for a sincere smile to be curved on my face. see pretty smiles?  :)

And today, i’ve attended about four classes (which one of them is not attended by our lecturer-  Political Science). Hell yeah, im very tired. Yet, i can smile so that i know that im doing great J (before this saddened me bad) T__T

Well, the classes that i have attended were:

8.30 am: Science of quran

10.00 am: Bahasa Melayu Lanjutan

11.30 am: Political Science. (just entered for half an hour)

3.00 pm: Introduction to Drama (there will be 6 plays to be performed)

Those four classes were alright. But i think i would drop Political Science, since I am soooooo not into politics.  -.-‘  

And, by theway, in BM class, i was sooo over-excited to speak in Malay. Tehehhe! And yes, im the one who talked and introduced myself THE LONGEST, I guess. :p

Even though the lecturers of BM and Science of Quran is not that good (as said by people), i  think I CAN AND WILL LOVE THEM. Tak ade kot. :p InsyaAllah. :)

I think that’s enough for the time being. This heart is sick, yet i still can breath. Amin ya Rabb. :’) Hopefully, i can comfort myself. To you, thank you. :’) Im strong. :’)

 to Sayba. thanks for accompanying me this evening. i love it when im happy. :)

SALAM UKHWAH TO ALL. LOVE YOU FEMALE DARLINGS! =D

Sila LIKE! XD

. tears falling .

i dont need a sadness in life. life needs to be happy. okay fine. its not always be happy, but we can make ourselves happy, as long as we want to.yes, we need to have a setting in mind so that we are not disturbed with all the pain. (yes, im in pain and im talking to myself) T___T

Life is just easy if we know where our life would lead to.

hey, ok, im gonna cry and let the tears speak out itself. T___T

p.s: nanti nak cite pasal hang out dengan girlfriends semalam. cuba tak sedih ok?  :') Sila LIKE! XD

. A Crying Baby (s) .

shoooo! shooo! mood swings! 

plzzz go away! :(

the first two minutes.

four minutes later.





and, and, end up with:








huaaaaaaaaaaaa mamaaaaaaaaaaaa.....  T________T


p.s: i know those babies cry  CUTEly more than I did. LOL.

so, i will cry like a baby.
*sad face*

wanna be a princess of cuddle-some as my friend did.
..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
.





like this. a mother cuddled me up :)
LOVE YOU, MOMMY ^.^

Sila LIKE! XD

. im totally down i guess .

salam.

i know my friends on my fb can feel the sense of sadness that i felt

every single day with my fb status. idk why, but i know its because of him.

ok i admit that i need him whenever i need him.

i was like thinking

"why i cant get him whenever im in sadness''?

okay fine, its me who sends messages etc to him, and 

im the one who feels stupid too, for thinking too much about him.

(and he, might not)

well, yes, im angry.im mad, and im alone.

the time passed with all the tears fall on my cheek before going bed.

isnt it sad? life is tough, i know.

but, some changes still need to be done.

im worried if i give up on this, and thats make me even more sad after this.

im worried if the phrase of "cant live without you'' is lingering on my head.

thats what im worried about.

i know u need time for yourself.

but i need you too.

i was thinking like u've been selfish ONLY FOR URSELF.

sakit tahu taaaaak? ;'(

Im sorry to all readers. both of us cant get in contact for more than a month.

and maybe it can be some months.fineee. i hope its even longer.

so, i'll be crazy and insane.nauzubillah.

saya tertekan sangat. takut kalau ganggu konsentrasi belajar. plizzzz :(

ya Allah, help me.... i need you, i dont need him. 

i need u more than i need him.

i know ur always by my side. i need you. :'(

im sick and im tired of crying. sangat tertekan sekarang.

im trying to hide all the sadness, and yes, im happy with my friends.

ya ALLah, terima kasih. syukur sangat ada kawan2 yang baik2 sahaja ;)

sayang korang semua.

saya tak perlukan dia.

saya sakit hati.

satu mesej pun tak balas.

rasa macam , kalau ada orang mati, atau saya yang mati pun, mungkin 400 hari kemudian,

baru dia tahu. sakitnye. sakitnye hati. :'(

note: all the pictures below is the behalf of some love that i've shared to those lovely bonds :)

and they are who can heal my sadness and wipe the tears. 

i love u guys ;')

ini geng di kelas2 yang sama kos dgn saya. sayang ejah dan lina ;')

geng dorm di nilai dulu :)

yes.a student of IIUM :)

 i can live  by myself. i love them damn much. ;')

thanks for wiping out the tears. and i'll try to

be positive from time to time. 

saya sayang semua sahabat2 saya ;')

<3

Sila LIKE! XD

. i want to smile! .

i'm sad....

eventough i've tried to be happy, and chill out,

plus, get rid of the sadness, it's still here.

i was like screaming and crying all over the time, 

so that the sadness can go out of me.

oh pleaseee, i dont need youu ;'((

the status on my facebook was

"Sarah Saadi, patience is the most needed here. Be strong.''

oh my God..i've spread negative charges already.

i'm sorry, people. i promise it will be fine sooner or later.

it just take some time to back to normal.

and yes, i need blogs to express this out,

so that i dont have to frown all the time, 

making a sad face. 

[ eventough i did. im sorry]

but im still smiling, to some friends, who make a joke.

heyy, come on! make some jokes, so that i can get the laughter,

and,,, and,, we can laugh together! :)

note to the person:

i feel like my fault who stop that first. :(

but then, if i havent, its still happen, right?

so yeah, i have to be rational in thinking.

also, REALISTIC. get out of me, negative thoughts!

alright, to be more mature thinking,

i will just stop and ignore all the sadness, and wait patiently for it to back to normal.

yes, Sarah is ALIVE! Thank God. 

:) u can see the teeth :)

wipe the tears, and ...



















yay!! it's a WIDE GRIN! :DD

alhamdulillah.. make me strong. i want to be happy.

"laa tahzan. innallaha ma'ana''
:)

Sila LIKE! XD